OmniVeggie

Today I would like to tell you about Matthias's favorite bread. It actually started out as a quest to find my favorite bread, but in a weird reversal, it ended up being his. In fact, it is so very delicious that the mere mention of buttermilk on the daily grocery list makes his eyes sparkle.

The reason this is strange is because the recipe comes from....
The Vegetarian Times.



Ideally, this bread would have lived up to its description as a good substitute for the sourdough I so dearly miss on this coast, without requiring the complicated nature of a starter (which, I would be happy to nurture in our refrigerator, if only we had room - the reason why we do not is a story for another day...). Oh but how this recipe failed me. I have tried using less honey, amping up the tang of the buttermilk with some additional vinegar, kneading for a longer duration to give me something chewier, and kneading for less time to give me something more porous. Alas, any faint resemblance to sourdough is completely absent in the final result.

Buttermilk Boule
Adapted from the Vegetarian Times
Serves 8 (makes 1 round loaf)

1 0.25-oz. pkg. active dry yeast
3/4 cup buttermilk
1 1/2 Tbs. honey
3 cups all-purpose flour
1 tsp. kosher salt

Stir yeast into 1/2 cup warm (110F) water, and let stand 5 minutes, or until liquid is cloudy and bubbles begin to form on surface. Combine buttermilk and honey in small heatproof bowl. Microwave on high 30 seconds, or until warm to the touch. Whisk yeast mixture into buttermilk mixture with fork.

Combine flour and salt in large bowl. Stir in buttermilk mixture until thick dough forms. Knead (in the bowl if you're pressed for space, as we are. Or on a well-floured surface if you have the luxury of counter space) 7 minutes, or until dough is elastic and no longer sticks to your hands. Form into ball, and set in lightly oiled bowl. Cover with clean dish towel, and let rise 1 hour in warm place.

Gently reshape into a tight, smooth ball. Cover again with dish towel, and let rise 40 minutes in warm place.

Preheat oven to 375F. Place onto baking sheet. Cut diagonal slashes across top of loaf with sharp knife. Bake 35 to 40 minutes, or until golden brown. Cool (if you can wait), slice and serve.




But! All is not lost! Because where this bread disappointed me as a substitute, it delights Matthias as a staple. He loves its faint sweetness, its incredibly dense crumb, and the way that it makes perfect bacon sarnies.

For you see, Matthias is the only person I know who can take a recipe from the Vegetarian Times and turn it into a meat-fest. I want to make fun of him for this, gently reminding him that every time I make this bread, there are potentially hundreds of vegetarians out there enjoying it as a vessel for veggies or plant based proteins. Sometimes I want to bemoan the loss of squishy tartness originally promised by this recipe. But mostly, I end up taking an immense amount of pleasure in watching Matthias concoct and devour this meal, for you see, it is just as good as toast for me, and I really do believe that breakfast is for benevolence.




Bacon Sarnie
Recipe adapted from Jamie Oliver
Serves 1

3 or 4 slices of thick cut, meaty bacon
2 slices of buttermilk boule (or other thick crumb bread)
Brown sauce/Steak sauce (we use Heinz because we hate Kraft and woefully, A1 is made by them; I am from near Pittsburgh and Matthias is from PA and all that entails. We buy locally...)

Fry up the bacon in a grill pan, cooking it until it's just tender and slightly crispy on the edges. There should be some bounce in the bite. Toast the bread just slightly. When the bacon is finished, drain it on a piece of paper towel, sop up the grease. When the bread is finished, place the bacon on the bread and add the brown sauce liberally. Enjoy.